Deux (2)

Today's the first day of classes in my... 123..4.5? 5th year in college? Wait.. 5 semesters + 2 semesters = 7. This is my 8th semester of most likely 11 semesters trying to get my undergraduate degree. I gradauate from high school in June 2006, I think i'll graduate sometime in 2013 with a bachelor of science in Chemistry. The choice of a double major or minor or graduate school has not been set into stone yet as I have not put in the minimal amount of effort to make a decision on such a matter.

There is a bunch of reasons why I am on the 5 1/2 year college plan and not the 4 year plan. For those of you who have IQs on the right side of the standard deviation curve, you might be asking yourself, 'but wait? 2013-2006=7 years?' I'll answer that, so you can chill out compadre.

 The first reason stems from my childhood and schooling. The lowest grade I had ever achieved in K-12 had been a C-. Always passing, even when it came to learning new material without paying attention to a teacher. When I was in my second semester at CU boulder, I had to drop calculus II because I was not going to pass it at all because I had not paid close enough attention in Calculus I. The derivative was a mystery and this integral thing was just impossible to learn with a bad foundation to begin with. "Well fuck," I thought.

Having never seen Batman Begins with Christian Bale, I had never learned to pick myself up and try harder when I fail. Yes I can be labelled as Asian American; more specifically 4th/5th generation Japanese American. But I'm still American. The association between Asians and posessing superior mathmatics skill is not always true. I'll touch back on that in a different post someday. Dropping doesn't equal failure, but when it's a prereq in college to continue at a smooth pace to graduate in 4 years, it's kinda a big thing. So retake Calculus I i did first semester sophmore year. I passed Calc I & II, but then got my first true F in Calculus III. F really does mean Fail. So there is officially an F on a transcript of mine. Distraught with my progress at the time I didn't even care enough to get higher than a D in a history of world art class the same semester.

'I love Chemistry, but God Damnit I Hate Calculus. So fuck it!' and I took 3 semesters off school to work as an emergency medical technician in Centennial. I'm sure the rampant drinking I did freshman through first semester Junior year and spending hours on end playing a MMORPG called Final Fantasy XI didn't help my concentration or grades. I even slept through my Physics II final. That was a big time academic momentum killer there. Luckily I was able to get the appriopriate signatures to take the final the following semester. Damn electromagnetism right-hand-rule was the epitome of just random bull shit that I didn't care about. In hindsight, I have changed my views on everything I learned in that course and personall I love understanding how electricity works.

I don't think I had the maturity to attain an undergraduate degree when I was 18-20 years old, but now that I am almost 23, it's... well... different. Today will be tomorrow's yesterday, but I am astonished how different I was as a person just a couple years of yesterdays ago. I guess it's less video-gaming, less drinking, less tortinos and ramen haha. Gonna try and take a nap now.

Numero Uno!

Well, since this is my first post, I guess I should post something about myself.

I'm not a good writer. Eeyup, it's true.
Continuing from there, I am a self-proclaimed nerd. But i hate labels. I don't enjoy labels because there is much more to an individual than what anyone stereotypically perceives. I guess this blog will just be what's going on in my life or what's on my mind at the time.

For instance, it's 11:55am at this moment and I can't seem to fall asleep and get some relaxation before class at 5pm. The fragmented memories of events and people racing in my mind made it impossible to fall asleep. It might also be the fact that it's 80 degrees inside my room right now. But enough on that.

Questions, questions...  I have no clear answer why I am giving birth to this blog or where it is going. This may be my journal, or perhaps it will be a way to dump my ideas out of my head so I can actually sleep. This may even be the only auto biographical record of my brief existence and this may be a way for my great great great --- grandchildren to have known who I was. Maybe i'll be a famous person one day and this will be the first chapter of a best seller, haha.. but probably not.

Any-who; this blog is not for the faint of heart, high in morals or soft in skull. (something to that effect) I plan to use vulgar language when appropriate or reminiscing about something really really retarded. If I offend the PC viewers, or Sarah Palin lovers, I apologize... kinda.. .. .. not really.